Top Tips

The expat  website this blog appears on has issued a call out for top tips on settling into the Netherlands. Actually I’ve found re-locating to the Netherlands comparatively easy compared to our last re-location to the US but in an effort to be helpful, here goes:

Learn the language.

Fortunately for us Brits, most Dutch people speak extremely good English, and unfortunately for the Dutch, I’m never going to pronounce 'goedemorgen' like a native, no matter how hard I try. In fact most Dutch people only have to look at me to know that Dutch is not my mother-tongue (I’m 5ft 2 so it’s a dead giveaway). The language barrier was probably more of an issue when we moved to the US – refer to an elevator as a lift and most Americans look at you as if you’ve just beamed down from Mars. Here in Holland it’s not a problem – there are no lifts, prepare for stairs.

Seriously though – it’s only polite to make the effort. You will receive post; you will want to read notices and endeavour to understand the parking permit and household waste bills that arrive with alarming regularity from the local Gemeente (another unpronounceable ‘hhh’ word). You might also want to be able to understand a menu  unless of course you don’t mind eating offal or wild hare. I know there is Google translate (do the Dutch pronounce that Hoogle?) – but that is not infallible. There are words in Dutch that just don’t exist anywhere else and NEVER jump to conclusions. For example, despite what you might think the first time you see it, oude kunst actually means OLD ART (masterpieces in fact).

Wrap Up Warm – it’s cold

We have yet to experience a Dutch summer and I can’t wait. The wind that blows down off the North Sea is icy. I can’t speak for anyone who lives in a modern apartment, but our 1930’s Dutch house is cold. High ceilings, lots of windows, and at least an inch of daylight around the front door. Invest in some warm clothing – I’ve yet to see my next door neighbour without his scarf (and that’s just for indoors).

Buy A Bike

If you want to blend in you’ll need a bike. There are no couch potatoes here – the Dutch are undeniably fit and they cycle everywhere. They start cycling the moment they are born (in fact I suspect Mama cycles to the labour ward and Papa straps her and baby on his bike for the cycle home). By the age of 3 they will have their own wheels and they’ll still be cycling at 80.

Keep an Open Mind

This is true wherever you go – not just the Netherlands. Every country has its own customs and habits and you just have to respect them. I didn’t like Zwarte Piet, but that’s just what the Dutch do, just like they sell cannabis in coffee shops and can’t make a decent cup of tea.

Retain Your Sense of Humour

Remember to keep hold of yours and learn to tolerate theirs. The Dutch have a particularly wacky sense of humour; even the most straight laced looking of middle-aged shop assistants can prove to be a right tease. You just have to go with the flow.

Be Realistic...and patient

Moving anywhere new is always going to be a struggle; it's an upheaval, it's stressful and it will take time and effort to settle in. See it as an opportunity to overcome adversity and find an inner strength you never knew you had.

And finally, when all else fails, sit back, relax and enjoy the apple cake!